So glad its spring and hope its lovely where you are readers. Here are some musings from Jude's mom.

I know it is helpful and reasonable to have benchmarks and developmental guidelines for my child. But as a first-time parent I go through a mental crisis every few months when I realize how little I know about helping a child develop. I don't know that he is supposed to know his body parts or know how to jump with two feet. I often feel like I really enjoy and love being with my child and would be very happy, if only I didn't have to also parent him--helping him learn how to eat, how to play nice, how to meet others and say his letters. It is a lot of pressure.

Stylin at 22 months

And now I face the hard truth that Jude is struggling a bit. He does not have the expressive vocabulary that some children his age do. We made the choice to have him evaluated for a free state program. And they came back with praise for many things but they agree that Jude could use speech therapy to help him express what he obviously understands.

It is hard to separate my child's performance from my identity...when I am the parent who is home with him. I told Greg last night that we are people who succeed, excel, and this is humbling and challenging when Jude does not measure up to some of his peers in this way.

So now for perspective today. I have to stop and think and ponder. My son is happy. He is healthy. He has a wonderful smile and a creative mind to explore, tinker, and yes, destroy many things he discovers in his world. He will be OK. The problem here is with me and my expectation that my child will always measure up.

I think this is a lesson longer-term parents learn, but now its my turn to get it.

Thank goodness God knew we couldn't measure up, that we can't be perfect our own. That we need his grace, and yes, the death of His son Jesus, to pay for our performance gap in life. And thank goodness he did.

Happy Easter to all you friends and parents from a fellow parent who doesn't measure up and yet keeps going.

I am treading through the Serenity Prayer these days and wanted to share it with you:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;

courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;

Enjoying one moment at a time,

accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;

Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it;

Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His will.

That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him forever in the next.

bath time is fun again

Grab your rain gear and read on to learn about bath time with Baby Jude. Its such a typical example of life at this age.

bathing beau

First of all its about Mess. Splash the water, squeal, and pour the water around the tub. Jude wants to see how much water he can move around. That seems to be the way he approaches playing with most of his toys, and unfortunately for Kara, its also the way he now approaches the neighbors' muddy garden bed and mud puddles of all size.

go water go

Secondly, baths are about smiles and laughter. Jude enjoys smiling at everyone he meets and having a good time playing.

Finally, baths are about asserting his opinion. Jude went through two weeks where he refused to sit down in the bathtub. He would through a complete fit if we tried to sit him in the water he normally loves. We resorted to quick dumps of water and quick shampoos of his hair while holding his hand or side with our free hand.
These bath time tantrums are good examples of Mister Jude in his terrible twos (which actually run from 18 months I'm told). Many activities now must be completed in a certain mysterious toddler order, or they provoke screams, stamping feet, or frustrated cries. Lord help us make it until he's three.

my way or the dry way

jude in winter

A few photos of some of the things Jude is up to recently.
He doesn't like ball bits usually, the large play areas filled with tons of colorful plastic balls that make you feel like you're swimming. But he loves the small contained balls in his toy box at home.

play ball

Kara only gets them out occasionally, or when he goes to the cabinet and points and says 'ball'.

Jude is also really into helping. Kara can get jude to do all kinds of things by saying "will you help mommy?" He loves getting out the broom, the rake, and the dyson vacuum.

little helper

It is amazing to see the creative ways jude stacks, layers or moves his toys. He saw an orange construction cone at his gym class. Jude decided to see if he could balance a beach ball on it and was so pleased when he did. He also enjoys playing with bead mazes. That's the fancy term for wooden or plastic beads on tracks that jude can move around.

bead baby

Kara had a small plastic one on a multi-use toy. But she was psyched to snap up an older, larger wooden one at a garage sale for cheap. Gotta love those garage sale finds!

spring indoors

Today Kara and Jude got to experience warm humid spring air and lush plants. Unfortunately we didn't travel to the tropics. But we did make a trip to Chicago's free Garfield Park Conservatory.

finally short sleeves again

The large indoor greenhouses include a show plant room where the spring flowers are already in bloom. It was nice for Kara to walk with Jude and see something besides grey skies and semi-melted patches of snow. She thought Jude would enjoy the flowers or give them an 'oh wow', but they were more interesting for mom.

azaleas

Jude did show interest in the conservatory's two interesting sculptures. And he was hushed into silence in the palm room, where giant palm trees and plants towered overhead.

a beautiful place to snack

Unfortunately the visit turned tramatic for Baby Jude. He loved walking into the palm room. The long fronds handing down were tickly, wet and fun to pull. Kara took him to the waterfall in the back of this photo below.

the dreaded palm room!

Poor Jude thought the waterfall looked very fun to walk into. He couldn't understand why mom kept saying 'no step', 'no water'. Kara tried to distract him by pointing out dozens of colorful fish in the large koi pond nearby. That backfired bigtime.

Jude tried 5 or 6 times to walk right into the pond. Each time Kara would pull him back. It ended with poor Jude in tears, not understanding why mom would deny him something that looks so fun.

Despite the turmoil kara counts the visit a success. It ended with Jude crashed in the car on the way home.

crash baby

I better run, I think Jude has found the Scrabble box. I can only imagine where the tiles will end up. Thank for reading!

why i hate the garage

I have a confession. I've come to hate our garage. Yes, its a safe, dry place for our cars and yard equipment to sleep during the winter. But it is also a source of tears and frustration to my toddler. You see he loves the garage. It houses his favorite play things. Mr. Shovel, the wagon, Mrs Broom and the new favorite, Mr. Snow blower.

jude out for a stroll

I know his dad is slightly bummed that the electric snow blower we own is actually light enough that a child can push it. I think Greg would prefer a larger, more powerful tool. But when its unplugged, loves to take it for walks.

just try and keep up mom

So here is why I hate the garage. Every time we go near the garage, go outside our home, or head to the car to go anywhere, Jude wants to play with the items in the garage. He makes the more sign with his hands. This often leads to tears and sometimes the dreaded arching his back to avoid the car seat straps. He holds out hope that this moment is the one where we will stop and play with them.

how much are you paying me for this job again?

At first it was cute. Little Jude loves the shovel, wow! Our 20-month-old would happily drag one down the sidewalk, snow or no snow, it didn't matter.

I love my shovel

But now he has to find one shovel and then a second shovel. But its not so he can push them. No this is so mom can push them, both of them at once. Even where there is no snow in sight.

So this is why the garage is no longer my friend.

Dear garage, let's hope you become a place of happiness, and no more tears, again soon.